Let's Roll...

Hey Fellas,

Happy New Year :) Let's start this year with some positiveness. Let's help ourselves to be lesser discontent. Here is something for self-love and self-discovery. 

As this year springs brace yourselves for another ride around the Sun, which will nothing be short of a roller-coaster, in my opinion. Why not it be? Life never assures a smooth and dull journey it has its way of trading with each one of us.

Mark Twain once quoted, "Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."

 Do you perceive how tiny you are in this cosmos? Try stargazing, I repeat. I have done it, and I have changed my way of looking at everything around me. I have worked on this part of my consciousness to understand how less miserable one can be to thyself. Gratefulness has helped me rewire my subconscious mind. 

I vaguely remember reading somewhere, "People may say and do many things, they will do what they know best, but will I allow myself to be tangled up in that, or will I go where I want to go?" I was never able to perceive this version of me earlier, but then here I am.If you could also perceive this, this will only help with your mental health.

The most significant aspect of life is to be kind and others will automatically get those positive vibes from you. Everyone deserves respect from a naughty 4-year-old to an angry teenager to a middle-aged person to an old sober/grumpy person.

Don't be a bad-spirited person. How hard is it to be a little gentle in this world? Try and you won't regret it. The simplest life hack for me and anyone is not to be perfect all the while. Besides, you live only in the moment called "Now" everything else is either imaginary or bygone. 

My aunt once told me about self-love. Memories of that conversation are still vivid. I am going to bestow that golden piece here:
 "Do you know what is the lesson learned the hardest way? Learn to draw boundaries. At some point, you need to draw a line saying who is inside and who is not. You can't keep everyone happy and it is not your job to keep everyone happy. However, you can always be nicer to people. Your job is to keep yourself happy first, learn to love yourself first before you love someone. Learn to give the best to yourself before you try to give the best to someone. "

This may conflict with the idea of being nice/kind to everyone but primarily be nice to yourself first. There is a proverb that goes something like this - You can't give what you don't have. So if you can't love yourself, you can't love others. 

Start your day with appreciation and fresh spirits. Let the universe take charge of everything else. You don't need to be perfect to be good, remember that. The only reassurance you need is of your own.

Last but not least "It's fine, it is going to be alright", this is the most persisting illusion called reality. Practice gratitude and feel grateful.

Happy Year Ahead :)

Love,
V

Things To Do This Father's Day

Sometimes it is now or never. There is no next time or second chance. You got to live your life in the present. Maybe the life is not about becoming something or someone. Today try unbecoming what you are presently and go back to your earlier self. Today try to be that someone who you are meant to be for that someone in the first place.  

NO matter how hard the life is, be obliged for you have a loving family, a shelter, 3 meals a day and handful of friends. You are already a lot fortunate than the plethora of people around the globe.  Now that I have already made you think that "Life is Good", it's time you go and do something for your Daddy. 


    1. If you remember when the entire world said No, Daddy was the only person to say YES and vice versa. Because he knows what is best for you. Pick up that fancy phone (iPhone or any fancy android), use the basic functionality of it. CALL HIM UP. And people already living with family go and check out what the old hero is up to and give him a hug.

    2. Start believing in yourself, you young person. Because you know, your Daddy believed in you and he never agrees to it. Go and see the man and sit as an adult (even if it is for the first time, it's just fine) and talk to him about life. 

    
    3. The Angry young man never sits for a talk? Always busy with newspapers or news channels? Drag him for a while for a quick cup of coffee. It is possible. Try it, my friend.  This man has a lot of secrets in life. You sure as hell deserve to inherit these secrets. Don't you?

    4. Having kids didn’t make him a father but raising them made one. He is not as expressive as your mummy, however, that doesn't mean he feels nothing.  Say thanks often, make him feel loved even when he doesn't express it, yet he deserves it. Hold his hand and show him the world, exactly what he did years ago.

    5. This gentleman has sacrificed a lot for everything that you are today. Go for a brief flashback to your childhood, strikes? He didn't teach life to you, he showed life to you.  Buy him a nice pair glasses maybe?  Or a holiday doesn't hurt much? 

    6. Since we are grown up already that's a sign of aging, this should also let you think that the parents are aging at the same pace as you are.  Does everyone talk about healthy lifestyle, healthy food and what not? Do you really think of what is happening back at home? Take him for a general complete body checkup soon. Give him that confidence that he is still the Tiger of the house and you are the cub and not vice versa. 

    7. "Behind every successful person is a woman" ever heard this? You sure do have. I don't know whatever made the person who quoted this not to think of a man behind the successful person.  The upraised, unsung and unnoticed hero behind one's success is also the Father. He is the most valuable asset.  Today make some time and discuss life with this  Unsung Hero.

    8. Becoming a father is easy enough, but being one can be very rough for he raised you. All that you remember is only being scolded by Daddy? Good for you. At least you are a comparatively better person than what you could have otherwise been. You owe him a lot. A Thank you and a pair of his favorite clothes won't harm your pocket much. 

    9. Every Dad is a hero to his kids. Every child openly or secretly loves their Dad. Oh, wait! Sending him "Happy Father's Day, Love you Dad" message? Did he reply a "Thank You" or is he struggling to reply back? You tech-savvy children, spend some time in teaching them the technology as simple as WhatsApp message, a video call, taking pictures etc. See the changed man in a week's time.  

    Don't forget to speak to him in person. If possible just go and see him soon. This man I tell you never expresses but surely deserves all the happiness at this once again tender age.  

    10. Father's Day is just like Mother's Day, only you don't spend as much. That's fine. The old hero doesn't demand much. All your father needs today is you my friend, just You. As they age gracefully, they don't need anything much. All they need are your calls, your good mornings, your happy talks, lunch/dinner together times, you make them proud every single day as a child and most importantly your TIME. 

So here is your Father's Day pick. At least pick 01/10 and make your super hero feel loved. 

Picture Credits: Google Images

Love,
Nutty Wordsmith!

Gone but not forgotten!

Years ago this day, she was happily attending her Uncle’s wedding. As a school going girl, she was over excited about the wedding. She was wearing a pretty lehenga choli which her Daddy dearest bought and there she was running all around the convention hall.
Only after a while had she realized that her mother and brother weren’t in the reception hall. They weren’t to be seen anywhere. Every guest that arrived, repeatedly questioned her where was her little family. She had no clue. Shortly after the wedding ceremony, she went on asking every other relative of hers if they had seen her mother, to no avail.
She strolled home which was a few kilometers away. Shockingly, there were none at home but her Grandfather. He then informed her, they were at the hospital. She certainly had no idea about what had happened. She inquired about the Hospital, which was again a few km from her home.
She walked to the hospital she was told about. As soon as she entered she saw many of her relatives in the hospital. There she saw, her mother grieving inconsolably. She saw her uncles talking to her mother. She looks here and there, she saw her brother in another corner. Running here and there with some hospital slips.
As an 11 year old, she barely had any clue about anything happening there. She walks closer and closer.  She saw two of her aunts standing close to a private room, around which the hospital staff is running about. She tried to enter the room and nobody let her to. She now became more and more anxious. Her heart beats are at a varying rate now. When she finally entered the room pushing everyone aside, there she saw her father in tremendous pain and agony. She could only see the cries in and around the room. He was crying in pain. He wasn’t able to move. The doctors around were giving him the injections. Nothing seems to be serving anymore. He wanted to pass the urine but he couldn't. He cries in pain. She was allowed to stand barely for 2–3 minutes in that room. He was immediately rushed to an Emergency. She was sent away.

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As an 11-year-old, once again she was clueless and crying. She was sent home with a relative of hers. When she reached home, the newlyweds were brought into the house. she went and locked herself in a room. She did not get out of the room until that night and surprisingly none even noticed it. At night, she walked out of the room only hearing her mother cry out loud. Her Father passed away that night suffering from Hepatitis B, until that day of which they were unaware of. 

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And that marked the worst 2 minutes at the hospital and the worst day in her life. Something she could never forget and something that would stay in her heart until the end of her time. Healing has its own way and it takes its own time. For every girl, her father is her first hero and for her, he lived up to every bit as a hero, a guiding light, a teacher, a superman and an amazing Daddy. He gave her the wings to fly and the vision to dream endlessly. The memories of endless love and the warmth make her all cold today. She is strong but tired. She wants a warm hug and a pat on the back. She wished if he could come back. She snuggles into her blanket and yet she is frozen. 

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She turns to the other side of the pillow as this side is already cold hiding her secrets. She slips into the sleep only to meet him again in the world outside this, the world of her dreams. 

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For he was the most beautiful thing she preserved in her heart and was her hardest Goodbye! Gone but not forgotten! 

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Love,
Vj (Nutty Wordsmith)

Kruthi - The Diamond That Could Never Be Cut!

Fiction # 4 -- Strong Is The New Beautiful!

Anthara was scrolling through her phone gallery, pausing here and there and smiling occasionally. She could close her eyes to reality but not memories. Memories for that matter are very insane and drive you crazy at times. After a good 20 minutes, she stopped at a picture and stared at one distinct picture for a long time. A picture of a couple of weeks fetus in a scan. A picture of a soon to be arriving niece/nephew. That very thought of another member coming into the family is exciting. Meantime, Anthara looked back to the days when Krisha was about to be born and how excited Kruthi, her best friend was. Having a best friend is the best thing ever.That was the coolest thing that befell, only if the storm had not hit their life, she thought.

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Kruthi was a very pretty and innocent girl. She was overly pampered by her parents and extended family. She was an apple of their eye. Kruthi was a lively and joyous girl among her friends. She was known for her impeccable dressing style and the food she carried from home. Kruthi was adored by her friends for the girl she was. Sooner than the family thought she was into her bachelor's degree. Every other family member made sure she was at her utmost ease when she stepped into her college. Although Kruthi was from a very sound and affluent family, her behavior had inherited no influence from the family status. She spent her time with friends from every walk of life.

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For Kruthi was a beautiful girl, she had gotten more alliances than any of her friends did during her college. However, there was no rush until she graduated but her soulmate arrived sooner than expected. For she had a very beautiful soul too she had agreed to marry a business man who was an average looking man. The very first proposal and she agreed to her parents' choice for her. Anthara was happy for Kruthi. For Kruthi always spoke about Varun, her fiancé and what a great guy he was. Every single time Kruthi told everyone how Varun never forgets to make it a point to surprise her, for he lived on another continent across the oceans. The love never found any excuses. It blossomed to be a beautiful flower by the time it was the wedding time.

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Anthara was enjoying every bit of how Kruthi had turned out to be a responsible woman who is just about to be graduated. While everyone else including Anthara was just the college going irresponsible and about to be graduated chicks. Immediately after graduation, Anthara moved out of her city for a job and Kruthi stayed home preparing for her big event.  As Anthara joined a new job, undergoing a training and was writing her exit exams, she couldn't be part of the big day. But she was very excited for Kruthi and made sure her family attended the event.

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After the wedding, Kruthi flew away with Varun. She called up Anthara and told how a great city she was living in and what was it to be married to Varun and living with him and making her new home. Anthara always hoped and prayed that Kruthi is this happy now and forever. Days passed by and months too. Anthara could only look back to the memories of college and could no longer live there. However, she was getting accustomed to new life and new people and same were the cases with Kruthi in the States. They moved on with their lives happily, one was building the career and another a family.

Life seemed like a garden of roses, until one day when the storm hit their life hard. Anthara was on a lunch table with her colleagues when she received a message. The message was from Kruthi that clearly stated - "I'm very sorry to leave this earth rather soon. I cannot live like this anymore. I am very sorry Mom, Dad and you all. Good Bye".  Anthara dropped her phone and started weeping inconsolably. Her colleagues read the message and tried to console her. Her Boss even asked her to leave ASAP and check on her friend. It was only a few days that Kruthi had moved to Bangalore. She was living all alone in a PG in spite of having a big family and house. The depression had made its way into her life.  Anthara made innumerable calls to her, to no avail. She then started calling Kruthi's mother, casually enquired how was everything. Her mother started crying and informed about the message they had received and then there was no conversation with her anymore.

Anthara lost no hope, she hired a vehicle and made her way to the place where Kruthi lived. Her mother gave some idea about the place. And then there is a trouble of searching the PG, where Kruthi lived. She informed her brother and a friend to start and search for her until she reached. The boys went searching in every possible direction, however, there were many Kruthis who lived in every area and the boys were not allowed to enter and check. This made it only impossible to reach on time and make sure things were fine. Anthara called for the (n-1) times, this time the phone was picked and she was only hoping it was Kruthi and none else. The tension that had built up over the last hour was beyond the imagination unless you have gone through it. Kruthi broke down the minute she received the call and only said she doesn't want to live and disconnected the call. This made it even worse to imagine the unimaginable by the time they could trace her. The minute Anthara entered the room, she was almost surrendering herself to the worst.

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Kruthi had surrendered to depression after a whole year of domestic violence. Kruthi's mother-in-law had made her life much worse than she could ever imagine, husband did not stand by her.  On the day of her 1st anniversary, she was in the courtroom for the divorce hearing. Every single day had been a hell to witness. For the girl just out of college, who was always being pampered by family this situation was unacceptable. She went on telling Anthara what had she been put into.
Anthara cried all night after hearing the trauma her friend was into.

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Kruthi was later sent to her husband's place. Things slowly started changing, for good. But however, mother-in-law did not surrender herself to any kind of changes. She once even left the entire house to get packed with LPG. It was only by luck, Varun entered the house from outside and got Kruthi out of the danger. That's when they decided to stay without Varun's mother. Eventually, after a year or so Kruthi conceived with Krisha.

Things were so different all of a sudden, just like the days when Kruthi was just married. Krisha's arrival had changed everything in everyone's life. The first time Kruthi smiled in a while was when Krisha's arrival was confirmed. Anthara could still remember when Kruthi's mother informed her of the news. Everything first that happened because of the baby was special. Every time Anthara spoke to her friend, she was never tired of the little baby's rantings by mumma. Anthara enjoyed hearing Peppa pig more than any other song now. Baby's first snow, her first walk, her little ramps, her first Krishna avatar everything appeared to be so special. Then on there was no looking back for Kruthi.

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Today Krisha is almost 3.5 years old and she knows there is a baby in mumma's tummy. Anthara keeps looking at Krisha's pictures now and then. It's no longer only Krisha now, there is another niece/nephew to arrive soon. Anthara who is now a successful working woman only looks at Kruthi and feels proud of her best friend of how courageous a girl she was. Anthara looks at Kruthi every time and realizes how to bounce back after the storm. Definitely, when the storm rips her into pieces, she had to decide how to put herself back together again. Being tested makes you much stronger than you ever were.

Part of Kruthi's life's mystery is how was she so calm in the storm. It was what she chose to become when she was walking through the fire. Every time a window closed, she ran to the next one and possibly broke open a few doors. As Buddha said, Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. Today Kruthi makes a house of a 3 with the 4th one coming soon and stands much taller than what she was with all the pride. Varun is now a doting father to Krisha and keeps Kruthi very happy.

"New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings." says Lao Tzu. All's well that ends well.

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Kruthi: Hello, hey we had a scan and I'm sending you the pictures.
Anthara: Really?? Waiting.
Kruthi: Maasi we miss you.
Anthara: Maasi loves you guys!


Love,
V
(Nutty Wordsmith)

A Letter To Younger Self!

Disclaimer: It is either likely or highly unlikely that any sentiments expressed in this letter in any way coincide with those of any other person in any way associated with me. I was often asked what would I suggest to my younger self, if given a chance. Here I've an article on what I would say.

Dear Mini-me,

You must have heard from everyone many times that "Do not grow up, it's a trap". Today after turning out to be a 20 something, I'm going to tell you what it is like to be a grown up.  I have time traveled 15 years back to tell you how much I love you and how we have synchronically made this life for me.

First thing first, don't ever be frightened of anything. The little school going girl that you are, you are a marvelous kid. All the naughtiness that has vanished due to the circumstances in the past year, I say you should continue to be the same naughty kid. When I look back to the time I have traveled, I feel it is boring to be a decent kid.

All the tough subjects in school syllabus aren't a big deal, you will still make it to the top. It's OK if the other person is scoring 0.5 or 1 mark more than you, in the end, it does not even matter. Do not get upset over missing a rank, go out and play games, get bruises and make more friends. Go play whatever makes you happy, you need not play with a doll/Barbie at all because you don't like it. It's OK to have short hair and not have braids when you go to school.

Have as many crushes as you want, I allow you to. I still do, why not you? I know, there are Hitlers' encompassing, you need not always tell them how many crushes have you had and how you perceive it. Act crazy and weird at times, you are not straight out of a classic story, and you can be weird too. Someday a Teacher will tell you "A lotus is still a lotus even in the mud", respect her for she is going to give you the best life lessons.

I know, you have had the unfortunate times at such tender age but that is only going to make you strong. Remember, every lesson from life is unpleasant but these lessons will not destroy or kill you.  Make more mistakes and learn the hard lessons by yourself. Trust me, you will not realize it at this time but you will learn a hell lot of things in the years to come.  When I see you through the glass, I see a shy and quiet girl who is bright and intelligent. Be proud of yourself and use it to your favor.

Give, But don't allow yourself to be used. Love, but don't allow your heart to be abused. Trust, but don't be naïve. Listen, but don't lose your own voice.  And my dear mini-me, stop brother-zoning every guy you meet; today I see I'm surrounded by the maximum number of annoying brothers. Possibly only person to have so many brothers around and they'll get you mad every time in the crowd even though they stand by you when needed.

All the ways that make you different are the ones that make you stand out. It's OK to be different. Dream big because that is what you are supposed to at this age. You will eventually achieve everything that you truly desire and deserve. If you feel, life isn't fair to you right now, this too shall pass. Most of the things that are taught to you by the school and society are not the facts, it's OK you will anyways figure out what is good for you.

People say you think too much, and it will continue even when you sail through the adulthood. Love yourself, because that is who you are going to spend the rest of your life with. I feel that everything happens for a reason, even though I fail to realize it at that point in time. In the adulthood, you cannot make more mistakes, as that is how life is supposed to be. Evaluate things before acting on them, let alone people think you are old school.

 Whenever you feel you are tired; drained physically and emotionally just remember you have to keep moving. You see, today mom is very proud of who I have become after fighting all the odds. I know things happen late in my life, but I have got the best ones. So you too make an attempt to trust in whatever is meant to be, it will happen.

If you think your life is not as perfect as that of your friend's, then it is only a matter of time. Be happy with all the little things that you have, while there are people with nothing and they do still smile.  Everything will come to you at the perfect time. Do what is right for you, for there is none walking in your shoes. No matter what happens and how hard it seems to be, you will be better tomorrow.

If any evil aunt asks you to learn cooking, just say you are still in school and you will learn it someday. Today, I can totally manage it all. Anyone if ever treat you in unfair ways, voice it out and stand for yourself. Stand for mom, make her feel safe around you. Be nice to everyone who is nice to you. Life is too short to live with regrets and disappointments. Do not waste time thinking of wrong things or people, 5 years from now it will not even matter.  The nicest ones that you have met and are going to meet will stay with you forever or at least they are here at this point. Feel blessed for what you have.

If all that you did today was to hold yourself, I am proud of you mini-me. Just be real, it’s not at all complicated.

Last, but not the least - When you are wrong, admit it; when you are right, be quiet!

Love, 
The grown-up you!